so i'm almost there. it's almost fixed. and now just torn from my hands and ripped again. i'm running out of thread. i'm not sure what to do now. i wish i could fix it faster. . . all of the time it tears slowly as i see them. i can feel that now. so why did you leave me? why did you so purposly hurt me? i can see it in your eyes that you don't want me. that you obviously don't need me. so why should you care??? why should you even bother to talk to me anymore? i doubt you even care if i die right now. "if you try hard enough you can fix it to be almost the same. there might still be some lines but just barely." so now what? i've hidden again and shocked myself by making eye contact but not saying a thing. i want to go home. i want to know how you really feel. and more than anything i want my heart fixed. "i know i deserve to be treated better than i am" you glare at me. "so find someone who will treat you better." i know you saw me fall to my knees. i know you heard me sob 'i know. i'm trying.' i promise you will never see me cry. you will never see a tear fall from my eyes. i promise.